It was Always for You
by Jessesgirl1549
Summary: An ever faithful servant's thoughts during his brief service to Diva's minons. Set during Blood Plus Adiago.


**A/n: First HajiSaya angst of the year for me. Set during Blood+ Adiago. Haji's POV. ****I don't own Blood+.**

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"You won't be able to save her..."

_Grass crunched beneath my feet as I came to a stop, craning my neck up to look at the girl perched on top of the high wall. _"Come down from there, you will get yourself hurt."

_She turned - the large hem of her dress and her hair swinging about - and she smiled at me. "_No I won't."

"You will fall."

_S__he jumped._

"Sa-!"_ My feet and my arms were in motion. _

"Oof!"

"Saya you must be more careful!"

_ She looked up at me from her cradle in my arms, her eyes shined and the corners of her mouth curled in satisfaction._ "But you saved me. You always save me."

_Once on her feet, she faced me. The wind tousled her hair into her eyes, she was grinning. I felt myself smile back, my heart called for her. She beckoned me, she asked me to play with her, with a simple wave of the hand_. "Follow me." _And she ran, I was not far behind. _

_Indeed, I always saved her..._

"It is only with the help of us that you will save your Queen from her inevitable demise by the _humans_." I didn't want to believe them. I knew I didn't believe them, they offered no help, they offered nothing but deceit and false hope. I should have spit in Rasputin's offered hand. And yet...

The skin on my palms was breaking, raking under my nails. I was shaking and could hear my teeth grinding, waring down. I could not... I could not let them... Not to her. But I was too weak... I was far too-

"We are both Chevalier, we both need our Queens. Why should we turn our backs on one another, when we could work together to save the ones we love? Join us, he urged me, his hand was extended farther, nearly brushing my chest,"or do you not love her as much as you seem to?"

A ripple of nerves ran through my fingers, they twitched.

I...

"I will stay by your side, you know that, I will stay by your side until you no longer wish me to."

_Sorrow was etched on to her features, her smile had gone a long time ago and was replaced by an ever present frown. She turned away from me, like her heart had, her short locks and long bangs shielding her eyes from my view._ "

I know..."_ she murmured sadly_. "Just leave me be..."

_There was so much pain in her voice. Pain I could not soothe._

"You will do fine." Rasputin said, the world turning black as he tied the knot at the back of my head, adjusting the blindfold so it would not slip. "Just remember, this is for her."

Hanging my head, I could feel the weight of my hair fall forward. My hands, which were folded behind my back, exerted an amount of pressure that was numbing. I thought of many things in that instant: my role in Rasputin's plans, my reason for being apart of it, and the gnawing feeling in my chest.

"Gentlemen-" Grigori began.

Behind the blindfold, my eyes closed.

Saya,

_Fingers intertwined with mine._

It was...

_The breath was warm on my neck, a cool nose pressed against my skin, sharp points delicately pressed into the hollow of my throat._

For you...

_Thunder cracked and the wind blew rain against the window. My arms held her even closer. Fear ran through me as if I was still a toddler, it was a childish fear. Yet she did not laugh. Saya held me against her chest - similarly to the way she had the first and last time I had cried in front of her - and she told me as long as we were together, nothing would hurt us...  
_

Everything, was for you...

_Laughter ran like water, my one and only friend cackled at the scenario that I had come up with for our future travels. It was a ridiculous thing I had said, and I had intended it to be so. For more than anything, I wanted to hear her laugh._

Because I...

_It was the first time she looked at me and was afraid. And it broke me, destroyed me on the inside. I had scared her, disgusted her in order to protect her. Her eyes, they begged me to hide myself, to take it all away.  
_

I love you.

"-let the performance begin!" With a jerk by my wrist, I came forward with the crowd a buzz.

_Forgive me, it was for you, it was always about you._

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**A/n: Review please and maybe give me an idea of what to write next?  
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